It's fun to talk about boys. Boys with gorgeous eyes, groovy hair, cute smiles and ripped stomach muscles, Aww, yeah! But what do they say when they talk about you?
In hopes of helping girls better understand the PS2 gender--without reverting to that tired, old "inside a guy's mind" cliche--we surveyed 150 guys about a way worthy topic: you! What do guys wish you knew? We asked dozens of boys, from the oh-so sweet geeks to the campus gods, what exactly do they want you to be down with when it comes to boy-girl relations. The next few pages are full of surprising stuff most of the dudes in our survey agree on and want to share with you. We'll be waiting for you to voice your opinions regarding these boy-isms at so feel free to take notes.
1 Calling you on the phone does not mean what you think it means.
"Please, tell me why a girl thinks calling her equals I want her to be my girlfriend," says Mikey. Blunt, but we like blunt. Mikey is in the majority when it comes to romancing the phone. Nearly every guy we talked to says he feels tons of pressure from girls when it comes to the telephone. "It's like calling a girl means I'm admitting I like her, but that's not what's up," explains Mikey. "It's more like I'm calling because I might like her. I hate calling because the next day the girl acts like she owns me. Or, if she's shy, suddenly she can barely talk to me because she's scared. It's stupid."
Knowledge is power You know you're hung up on the phone if, when a guy calls, you think you have some kind of romantic upper hand. "I'm just calling because you're cute or nice or whatever," says Jordan. "If you treat me like I'm a dog just because I think you're cool enough to dial up, then you're a b-word." In other words, for a guy, it's just a phone call, not a confession of undying love. Hel-lo?
2 You are much prettier without all that makeup.
Judging from our survey, boys can't stand makeup. In fact, it seems they can't complain about it enough. Sure, they all like pretty girls, but they also have a problem with a face that looks full-on painted. And what looks painted to a guy is far less than what you might think.
"Why do girls think they need to have so much crap on their faces?" asks Billy. "Girls at my school wear all this black crap on their eyes, and their lips are, like, thick with brown goop. It's ugly. Do they really think that will get them a guy?"
Don't think we didn't set Billy straight about one thing: Not all girls apply makeup to "get them a guy." Still, it's true that lots of girls get all dolled up so they'll be attractive to the opposite sex. But the makeup thing... It's more fun than anything. Right, girls?
Knowledge is power The hated for cosmetics is no joke. One dude even tided his survey "Rodeo Clowns." Could natural-looking makeup be the best date makeup? If being hot to guys is your goal, remember that. Otherwise, it's your choice if you want to apply enough purple mascara to impair your vision. Go for it.
3 When you act spazzy and giggly, ifs seriously embarrassing.
"What is up with girls hopping up and down when they're happy about something?" asks Pete. "A girl definitely invented the word 'yay!' because no guy I know has ever used it." Are you guilty of doing the Gily Woo-hoo! dance? It's a combo of baby claps and bobbing on your toes while emitting high-pitched squeals of delight. This all in reaction to, say, seeing the slide projector set up upon entering French class.
What's the big deal? "I really do want to know why are girls so excited about normal stuff," says Pete. "Every other thing, it's like, 'Ohmigosh! No way!"'
Knowledge is power Colin, a self-described shy boy, has something interesting to say: "I think girls like attention, and being excited about something makes people look and wonder what she's so happy about." Good theory.
Arnie, a jokester, has a theory of his own: "I think girls are just different. You're raised to let your feelings out, even if they're bad. I've never seen a guy friend cry, but I've seen a chick fall apart because some dude she liked didn't pick her for his volleyball team in phys ed. That's dumb."
We're not here to tell you how to act. Just tuck it in the back of your mind that all the boys we surveyed agree that girls could mellow out a little. Let's have a round of baby-claps for that, please.
4 Gossiping, whispering and writing notes makes y on look beyond shallow.
"Girls are always passing notes around in class, and it's just so friggin' dumb," says Joey. "Or they'll look right at me, then whisper to each other and laugh. Do they want me to think they're talking about me? 'Cause I do. And if it's really true and they are talking about me, then that's just lame."
Rude is the word, actually, Joey. Whispering, especially with the cupped hand at your girl's ear, is just so third grade. And gossip? "When I hear one girl talk trash about another girl, it's like I can't believe it," says Dominick, "like I'm in a bad movie about how mean girls are. If I heard my friends were talking about me like that, I'd transfer schools."
Knowledge is power People talk about other people. That's life. But there is a big difference between gossip and character assassinations. Not to mention, it's bad form to let anyone believe you're saying negative things about him. So, sorry to get all motherly on you, but if you absolutely must exchange information, be cool about the notes and discreet about the whispering. Oh, and do be sure that the "information" isn't going to hurt someone's feelings, OK?
5 Boys worry about what you think of their hair, skin, weight and clothes.
"My best friend is a girl, and the other day she said my hair looks exactly the same every single day," says Luis. "I couldn't believe it because some days my hair is jacked up." For the record, Luis is a cutie with great hair.
A recent nationally televised newsmagazine show had a big story about how men are the new vanity victims, and how they stress on their looks as much or more than women. But, if a guy suffers vanity, he doesn't talk about it--at least, not to girls and not as much as girls.
What we know: Guys totally think about their appearance even if they don't say it out loud. "I bad to ask my mom to take me to the dermatologist because I was breaking out on my cheeks and back," says Jay. "I couldn't stand it."
His friend Robert has a different issue: "Girls like guys with good bodies but, when I try to get six-pack abs, it never works. I just feel like I have a spare tire all the time."
Knowledge is power If you could get a view of Robert, you would tell him what we told him: He's out of his mind--the boy is a total babe! But here he is trippin' on his gut. Moral of the story? Boys have self-image issues, too. Isn't it a relief to know that?
6 PMS is no excuse to he mean.
"I know girls get weird at 'that time of the month,' but I don't get why they have to act like I'm their worst enemy," confides Sean. "Sometimes, my sister acts like she wishes I were dead because I won't give her the remote control, but all that's going on is she's PMSing. Screaming at me and freaking out on me isn't right."
We know what you're thinking: Boys just don't understand what it feels like to wake up with serious cramps and have to get up from that warm bed at 6 a.m. to put on tight jeans over a bloated belly so you can go do fractionals in homeroom. So, yeah, we feel your pain--and we really mean feel it. But that's the point: Boys don't.
Knowledge is power So, you're pained? Look, face it--the hormones that go with menstruating affect moods and, yeah, sometimes make a girl mean as a hungry dog. But barking at a boy because you don't feel well? Just deal the best you can by taking care of yourself. This includes not totally indulging in caffeine, sugar or greasy foods--all three aggravate physical and emotional symptoms. Get plenty of sleep, drink loads of water, and take lots of warm baths--yes, even in the afternoon when you get home from school. Soaking in bubbles while daydreaming is an on-your-period girl's best friend.